Thursday, February 25, 2016

Loss

                                                                                               





Loss




     I am going to kill myself tonight. I have my gun loaded on the table next to me, bottle of Scotch next to that and a case of Pabst Blue Ribbon in the fridge. Been drinking PBR all day long. It's been days since I slept. These pills I take keep me up. I quit taking those weeks ago, but I still can't sleep. Something happen to me after the crash, other than losing both my legs. Guess I should start from the beginning.
     I met a gorgeous woman at my friend's New Year’s party. I didn't want to go, but you need to show up in person once in a while to keep the peace.
     "Hey, there he is!" Dave said as I walked in the door. I didn't even have my fucking left foot in and he's already starting his shit.
     "Damn, Dave. Put the spotlight on me." I said.
     "Mingle, Man! Mingle. Jessica has her cousin here. She's single, I had her bring her for you, but she doesn't know that." Dave said.
     It was 11:30pm when I got there. I wanted to just have a few drinks, kiss some random chic and leave. But that random kiss turned out to be true love.
     Jessica's cousin (Mia) turned out to fit me pretty well. She didn't want to be there any more than I did. Which lead us leaving together after our kiss, so we could get to know each other in private. That doesn't mean sex, but it lead to it. We just seemed to fit each other perfectly. I keep saying that, but that's how it was. Instant love. I been dead for years, she brought me back to life. We moved in together within weeks. Jessica told her it was going too fast. She tried to slow us down every time Mia called her. Mia's daughter died a few months before we met. Her kid's dad died a few months before that. She had her demons and problems, but so did I. Two broken people become one complete person.
     We were together for a few years. Still in love like we were during our first kiss. She loved to go riding on the Motorcycle. We would go on long trips on the bike. Just get on and go down some highways we never been on, get a hotel room and come back home by Sunday. She loved getting away on the weekends. We left one weekend and on the way back a deer hit us while we were going 65 mph. We swerved into a SUV which tried to avoid us and ended up flipping countless times. I remember looking in Mia's eyes as she died and seeing children falling from the sky after being ejected from the SUV. The Bike hit the guard rail, crushed my legs and smashed Mia's head in. She just went. I like to think she didn't feel pain. My legs were just exploded flesh. The man crawled out the SUV, unharmed. He lost all his family in seconds. His wife, four girls and his dog all dead on the highway. I'm lying on the road with mangled legs and a dead girlfriend. The Deer is probably eating berries in the woods. He screamed until his throat bled it seemed. I waited to die next to Mia. I was lying in a puddle of our blood. What a perfect way to go. I thought. I passed out and woke up with no legs and months missing from my life. I was put into a coma while my body healed, but didn't wake up like they planned. While I was out, Mr. SUV man killed himself with a .357 revolver. He tried to come kill me while I was in a coma, but ended up in jail for a few months until he got out. His first night home, he did it. He thought I caused the crash. He never knew about the deer and I never had a chance to tell him. He lost his whole family and I lost my Mia (which was two months pregnant) and my legs.
     After waking up and getting my head around the whole situation, I felt this heavy presence. Could of been the ghost of my lost limbs, but it had hatred to it. It never let up. All day and night, I felt it. Even in my dreams it was there. I think it was the father that killed himself.  He blamed me for his family's death. Now he is trying to kill me beyond the grave, I know it. I can feel him so strong because I was near death for months.
     It's almost midnight. I been thinking about my Mia all day long. She was my world, my everything. And she was gone in minutes. A random deer jump devastated so many. People died, and people killed themselves. Me being one of the people that kill themselves. How can I live knowing I got the woman I love killed? Her family blames me. He blamed me. I blame me. I should have kept an eye out for wild life, but I didn't. It's almost time. Do I shoot myself through the mouth? Behind my ear? On the side of my head? I don't know. I just know I don't want to be here anymore. But.... I don't want to feel any pain. I know all the pain I caused, but I don't want to feel any. I'm sure I deserve it though.
     His presence been strong all day. I think I'm ready. But if I kill myself, what's on the other side? He has been wanting me to kill myself, but what's after that? Does he get peace? Do I suffer for what happen that day? Do we go into new bodies? I just know I don't want this body or life anymore. Nothing is left for me here, but pain and heartache. I am going to pull back on this .357's hammer and pull the trigger. The world won't miss me. I didn't give to this world, just took. Goodbye.

The End


Tuesday, February 23, 2016

Something BIG










Something BIG





     “This is the start of something big.” She said to me. I didn’t believe it then, but I believe it now. A lot has changed since those words entered my ears. And not all of it is for the better.
*
     We stood there looking at the body she just stabbed over and over in my living room. I couldn’t believe all the damage she did to him while I was in the bathroom. It couldn’t have been ten minutes and she had his head halfway off.
     “What the FUCK did you do?!” I yelled at her.
     “He tried to touch me. NO ONE touches me without my permission!” She screamed.
     “Okay, okay… Keep it down. We need to get him out of here and get out of town. How much money do you have from the long weekend at the club? He might have a stash at his place.” I asked.
     “Plenty enough to get out of state. I have a friend we can stay with no one knows about. And how are we going to get him out of here?”
     “We’ll have to cut him up and take him out in suitcases. I have three in the room, go grab them.”
     She went in the room and came back with three cases and an excited look on her face.
     “Why are you so happy? I have a dead asshole on my floor and we have to do some unspeakable things and you’re smiling. How about you cut his ass up and I’ll wait outside the bathroom.” I said.
     “This is the start of something big.” She said.
     “And what’s that?”
     “I don’t know, but I can feel it. Can’t you?” She asked
     “Let’s just get his ass in the tub and you do the cutting, I’ll do the packing.”
     She had the biggest grin on her face the whole time. Her hands and arms were almost black with blood. Sweat beading on her forehead and face as she hacked away at limbs. She was in heaven… a sick and twisted heaven. It took us almost 2 hours to get him cut up and in the cases. We had to drag the body down two staircases to get him into the van.
     “If we’re leaving town why did we need to clean up?” she asked.
     “This guy is connected to the clubs we work at and has his hands in some drug trafficking. They can’t find out he was fucking murdered at my place. I’m happy for that rug. It had the rubber bottom and kept all the blood off the actual floor. We might get away with this. I know he has a stash at his place, we just need to stop by at the right time to get it.”
     “Something big.” She whispered as she kissed my cheek.
     “Yea, something big. Hopefully it doesn’t turn and fuck us both.”
     We took the body to the bridge and threw suitcases off the side. After the first one I thought we should weigh them down, but it was too late, one was already in the water, might as well throw the other two in. We were getting the fuck out of dodge anyways. Just enough time to get what we need from his house.
     We chilled in the van for a few hours and waited for his lights to go out. We didn’t need to go into the house, all the money and coke was in the garage.
     “Okay, let’s go.”
     “I’m not fucking going.” She said.
     “Why the fuck not?”
     “I’m scared of the dark.”
     “You just cut a man to pieces!” I yelled under my breath.
     “Yea, so… the lights were on though.”
     “You are some special kind of fucked up, huh? Fuck it, I’ll be back.” I said.
     “Okay, Arnold.”
     I went toward the back of the house, keeping to the shadows. I’m always wearing black, so being seen isn’t an option for me tonight. I got to the garage and picked the lock fairly easy. I cracked the door and slid inside, shutting it behind me. I pulled out my cellphone and illuminated the space with my screen. Took me maybe 20 minutes to find the secret section behind one of his cabinets. At least $50,000 in cash and 5 pounds of coke in there. I put it in my bag and headed back to the van.
     “Fuck, what took you so fucking long?” she said as I opened the driver side door.
     “I had to do my thing, okay? Shit takes time.”
     “Whatever. Let’s get out of here. This town gives me the creeps.”
     “I may never understand you.” I said.
     “What did you get, by the way?” she asked.
     “I got a few bricks of coke and some mo…….”
     That’s when I heard a loud blast. I felt glass and something wet all over my face. I looked over at Judy and her head was almost gone. The body’s wife came out and shot Judy’s head off with a shotgun. I had some pellets in my shoulder and neck when I sped off. With Judy beyond dead in my passenger seat and me bleeding like a pig, I HAD to stop at the ER. I didn’t want to die. I figured I’d go in and get fixed up before anyone noticed anything. Guess the security guard got keen on my van and checked it out. Kind of hard to miss blood all over the windshield of a black windowless van.
     So, here I am, in a prison cell, telling my story. Something big, huh? Getting your head blown off is a big event. I almost died. The doc said, “Seven more minutes, and you would have been a corpse on my table.” Such kind words. I’ll do my time and get out an old man. At least they give me a Guitar to play in here.

The End
     

Sunday, February 14, 2016

Control









Control




     Kill her. Take that pen and shove it in her eye.
     You know I can’t do that.
     Take that fucking pen and do it. What are you waiting on?
     We’re still in the open. Give me time to get her by herself.
     Time? Time isn’t given, time is fucking taken. Take it!
     In front of all these people? Give me a break. I think I’ll take the time I need to play it safe. I want her as much as you do, but not enough to spend the rest of my life in prison getting fucked by a 400 pound guy.
     Let me take control and we will take her together.
     No. I remember what happen last time you took control. I spent time in jail while you went deeper. If shit goes down this time, YOU will do the time and I will go hide deep away.
     Fair, let me get full control.
     Shut up, here she comes.
     “Yawning already? You just got here.” Sue said.
     “Yea. Late night.”
     “I have a headache and you don’t hear me bitching do you? Sign these papers and go back home. You have been going out of your zone. Next time that happens, I’ll have your ass back behind bars in a blink of an eye.” Sue barked.
     “Must be hard to drink all night and look at all these numbers.”
     “Just sign the fucking papers and leave. I need to do a house visit to make sure you’re not hiding anything. I will be bringing a piss cup to make sure you’re clean. I hope you have dirty piss, so I don’t have to look at you anymore.” Sue said.
     Please, let me kill her now.
     Not yet.
     “Hello! Daydream on your own time, mine is valuable.” Sue said.
     Papers signed. Let’s go home and get ready for this lazy bitch. I want to have fun with this one.
     “I will see you soon, Sue. Have a blessed day.”
     “Fuck off.” She said.

*

     Where is she? She was supposed to be here by now.
     She probably drank too much last night. When she comes in, you take control and do what you need.
     What I need? What we need. You don’t want to do any more time do you?
     No… but I…
     No. Simple as that. She is threatening us every time we have to meet with her. She’s our parole officer and a major pain in our ass.
     Yea. We don’t need a pain in the ass from her or from big bubba in the pin. I’m going to hide deep until it’s done.
     She’s here.
     Take control.
     “About fucking time. I been knocking for two minutes.” Sue barked.
     “Come in, Sue.”
     Shut the door and lock it. If she tries to run, it’ll give us time to get her back.
     “You wincing because of the sun or because you drank all night and got cum in them?”
     “Ha-ha. We have a comedian here.” Sue laughed
     Walk to the kitchen and get the zip ties. Make sure she doesn’t see you. She has a gun and is looking for a chance to shoot us.
     “What are you smiling about?” Sue asked.
     “Are we smiling? We haven’t done that since the day we got out of prison. Do you know when we quit smiling, Sue?
     “When you look at your dick to piss?” Sue said.
     “Later that day when we had to meet you. You been making our life a living hell since we got out.”
     “Why do you keep referring yourself as we?” Sue asked tentatively.
     “I am the dark one that lives within this body. He is deep inside right now and I am in control.”
     Get her! Don’t let her get to the door!

*

     I blacked out. What happened?
     When I told her about us, she freaked out and ran to the door. I grabbed a hand full of hair as she was running and slammed her head into the door. She started to yell, so I had to do something. You might not like this.
     Tell me you didn’t kill her in the living room.
     Well, no. I had to use that glass statue to hit her over the head and it shattered.
     Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. I can NEVER get another one of those. Where is she?
     She is in the kill room.
     How long have I been out?
     Only a few hours. Let’s go have fun with this lazy bitch. She would have put us away if you didn’t let me do this. She has been putting other cons away so she wouldn’t have to deal with them.
     You’re in control.
     “You look tired? Did you not get enough rest after we knocked your ass out?”
     “You can’t do this. They know where I am. You have a fucking ankle bracelet on and you’re on house arrest. Where can you go?!” She asked.
     “We’re not going anywhere today. Today is our day with you. We have you laying on your back so we can put a towel over your face and pour water over it. We might do this for an hour or so, then move on to something more fun. What do you think?”
     The towel thing is going to do what?
     It’s going to make her feel like she is drowning. It’s going to be fun. I left her legs free so we can watch them fling around.
     Look at her go. She doesn’t like that at all. Don’t do it too long, you don’t want to kill her yet. I can feel you have bigger plans for her.
     “Stop! I’ll do whatever you want. What, do you want to rape me? Is that it?” Sue asked.
     “We don’t like fake, ugly bitches with drawn in eye brows. Hold still. You have another half hour of this, then we will give you a break while we go get some… toys.”

*

     What happened? I went too deep and couldn’t see anything for a while.
     Well, I finished her with the towel and water over the face. Thought I went too long and killed her, but she came too as I started to chop her hair off. All of her makeup was off, so I wanted to give her a haircut.
     Looks like you did a shitty job. Like you did it with a weed wacker.
     Dull knife we had did just fine. Now she looks how she acts. She still needs to get a makeover to appear how she really is.
     I can’t see the table so clearly. What’s all laid out on the table?
     I had to go to ace hardware to get some tools. I got some pliers, duct tape, super glue, 4 inch wood nails, hammer, blow torch, some plastic sheets and some chocolate milk.
     Chocolate milk?
     Yea. I’m thirsty.
     “Wake up, Sue.”
     She isn’t moving. No way she can be dead, we only been gone for an hour.
     Let’s see if she stays asleep after we pull one of her nails off. Hand me the pliers.
     Get them yourself. You’re in control. I feel myself going deeper. I see one of my old tricycles from when I was younger.
     Go then, I will fill you in. This won’t take long. Which one to do first? I think I’ll do her pinky nail first. This is going to be easy. Nice, long nails; she must get them done every week.
     “My fucking nail! What are you doing?!” Sue screamed.
     “We’re doing your nails, Sue. Don’t you like it? If you’re wondering why your hands are duct taped to the chair, it’s so we can do all of your nails at once without interruption. Doesn’t that sound like fun?!”
     These nails are coming off easier than I thought. You’re missing this, buddy. She is screaming like a pig. I almost want to pull one of our nails off to see what it feels like. They come off without any effort.
     “Stop moving your fucking fingers, or we’ll cut them off one by one. You want me to do just your nails, or do you want to lose fingers?”
     “Nails!” Sue said with snot coming out of her nose.
     Just two more nails to go. Saved the thumbs for last. These might give us trouble.
     “Look at that. You look so pretty now. No eye brows, no hair, no nails and no makeup. Now you’re looking more like yourself instead of wearing a disguise to trick people. I have to say, I liked you better with nails, though. Let me put some nails back on you.”
     You got nails for her?
     Yea. 4 inch wood nails.
     “We’re back. Are you ready for your new nails? You should be use to this.”
     “Please, just let me go. I won’t say a word.” Sue pleaded.
     “You know what, Sue? I know for a fact you will not say a word to another soul about this.”
     “Please. Don’t. What are you doing? What’s in your hand?”
     “We have super glue. It’s for your mouth. Hold still or we’ll sew your mouth shut.”
     No one can hear her. Why are you gluing her lips shut?
     She sounds like a pig. I don’t want to hear that. Your ass been hiding for some time. Stick around and enjoy this.
     I can’t even look at her. I’m going to slip back.
     Leave me to do the dirty work for us.
     “Let us put on your new nails, Sue.”

*

     Before you ask, I put a 4 inch wood in each finger. No use for the duct tape anymore. The super glue didn’t last long; she ripped her lips apart on the first nail I hammered in her finger. She passed out after 4 nails.
     I think she might be dead.
     Don’t be silly. She didn’t lose that much blood.
     What’s next?
     I am going to do her toe nails next, then I am going to cover her in that plastic wrap and set her on fire. She’s always trying to look hot for everyone, so she’ll die being hot.
     This is going too far now. I thought you were just going to torture her for a bit, then, I don’t know.
     What?! Let her go? You know we can’t go back. I couldn’t do the first stent in the slammer. I spent those years playing in your childhood. Which fucking sucked by the way.
     Well, I’m not doing time if we get caught again. You’re fucking doing it. And I will go back and live in my shitty childhood while you get fucked by a 400 pound queer.
     “Wake up, Sue. It is almost over. Just a few more hours of unbelievable pain and you’ll be free and so will we.”
     “You’re letting me go?” She asked with blood, snot and tears running down her face.
     “Letting you let go of this life. You’re not needed anymore.”

*

     The fire is too big! If it reached the floor above, my house will go up in flames! Do something!
     It won’t get that high. She is still kicking but she’ll be gone soon enough. And who cares if the house goes up? They’ll come back here looking for her.
     They won’t find our torture room. We can bullshit our way out of an investigation. 
     Fuck! It’s reaching the wood floors. I think we need to get this fire under control. She’s dead now anyways.
     Go in the kitchen, the fire extinguisher should be up to date.
     Why are there cops outside?
     Why are they armed and aiming at the house?
     Maybe she had a panic button? She been gone pretty much all day. I was hoping she had other calls after us. Fuck. They’re hitting the door in.
     “Get on the fucking ground!” A cop yelled.

*

     “How long has he been like this, Dr. Sokolov?” The nurse asked.
     “6 months, yesterday. They brought him here after he tortured and killed his parole officer in a brick room under his house.”
     “Oh my God.”
     “They thought he was just trying to plea insanity, but he’s been like this the whole time. Eyes never move and he never speaks, but his brain is fully functional. He just slumps to the side and stares at the wall, like he is in a dream. We never witnessed anything like this before. Very interesting case.” Dr. Sokolov said.
     “I guess he’ll be easy to take care of. I’ll get to it. I’m sure you’re busy, Doctor.”
     What now?
     What do you mean? I am not spending time in prison. I’ll just stay in my childhood the rest of my life.
     Funny, because I’m not spending it either. I’ll just go back to other memories I can find in here. Not too many fond memories, though.
     I’m sure you can find a few from my 20s. At least we have each other.
     Here we go! I like this memory. She was pretty cute and this night looks like fun. I think I’ll relive this for a few years.
     “Doctor! He’s smiling!” The nurse yelled.

The End

This story is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events or locales or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.